More Shadows of Hope

Wednesday 26th. A meeting at the hospital to discuss the next steps (code for Discharge options). My daughter was there, and we joined the Social Worker, the Registrar, the OT and the PT. The Registrar chaired the meeting, and we looked at the options for caring for Rosemarie at home. The SW agreed that if Rosemarie couldn't walk she would need 24 hour care and Lambeth would not fund that for home (it wouldn't be feasible anyway - the flat is too small for live-in help) but only for a placement. This is not what we want. I made a promise to Rosemarie that she would not be put in a home.

The PT was not optimistic about Rosemarie walking again and thought a final decision could be made in a week or two. My daughter and I protested that this was a bit soon to make a decision that was going to affect the rest of someone's life, and we asked what we could do to help. We stressed that we were committed to this happening. The PT agreed to schedule more sessions.

We established that if Rosemarie could walk then a care package for sixteen hours a day sitting service plus nurse input for medication may be available from Lambeth. The SW also said that the place at the Day Centre would remain open for the time being.

Me, my daughter, the SW, OT and PT came back to Rosemarie's bed to find her cheerful and smiling. They drew the curtains and she said something about 'her girlies' so the SW and I left them alone. They tried to get her to move to the edge of the bed and she began to get distressed. From outside we could hear her objecting and struggling and telling people loudly and clearly to go away. Things seemed to be getting very stressed so I went in and found her struggling with them. She looked at me fiercely and said "Go away!". I leaned towards her and held out my hands and said "Come here and say that!"

She grabbed my hands and pulled herself to her feet.

This seemed to shock her as much as us and we raced to get a chair for her to sit in. She would not sit in the chair but she stood several more times. This seemed to be more than the OT and PT were expecting and I was quietly pleased that Rosemarie had delivered at exactly the right time.

She rapidly became tearful - I think the effort drained her, but she compliantly drank a whole cup of tea afterwards. A lovely, serene nurse called Kadeon stopped by and urged us not to give up. She said she had seen miracles happen in the ward.

The Community Mental Health Team doctor came by and told us that there was some discussion about the dose of Sertraline Rosemarie should have. She thought it helped with the tearfulness and distress, and wanted to increase the dose, but the hospital doctor kept reducing it again.

A stressful day that had highpoints but against a soundtrack of Rosemarie's tears until the very end.